Bloggers and fashionistas may be concentrating on willing a free Campari their way as they sit in the #frow, but they should probably be more concerned about who may be sitting behind them... We may only be halfway through MSFW, but we've already heard enough corkers to last us a lifetime.
Here are the funniest moments from the last three nights that we happen to have been within earshot for... You have been warned, Melbourne. Don't force us to publish round two.
Girl 1: I think the free Camparis are only for the frow.
Girl 2: Nuh uh. I saw one in the second row.
Girl 1: SO DREAMS CAN COME TRUE
Girl 1: When is this runway starting?
Girl 2: I’m ready.
Girl 1: Mom’s spaghetti.
Girl 2: Dance monkeys dance.
Girl 1: [Looking at runway outfit] I’m here like, shit, should I be wearing a do-rag?
Girl 2: If fashion has taught us anything, it’s that it’s ok to culturally appropriate.
Girl 1: ‘Shakers’ just came up as a trending word on Twitter.
Girl 2: BUT WHAT ABOUT THE MOVERS?!
Girl 1: Wow, a vagina bum bag.
Girl 2: V Aussie.
Girl 1: Tres mate.
Girl 2: Now that Werribee Plaza has had a makeover, there’s nowhere for these kids to go. It’s sad.
Girl 1: Mercury is in Retrograde, so clearly that’s why none of my #ootds are killing it right now.
Girl 2: So THAT’S why my snap didn’t get any likes.
Girl 1: [Looks at runway outfit] This feels like plagiarism.
Girl 2: I can’t concentrate. The occasional elephant sound in the music is attacking my subconscious.
Girl 1: Do you mind if I put my wallet in your bag?
Girl 2: Can’t you put it in yours?
Girl 1: Oh no, this isn’t a bag, it’s the torso of a mannequin.
Girl 1: Frow is wasted on idiots trying to use flash.
Girl 2: Seriously tho.
Follow Bianca's CSI-like journey through fashion week at @_thesecondrow – but don't come too close, she may quote you.