21/01/2016
This is the gospel according to Snapchat.

Words by

Eliza Sholly

Those who follow me on Snapchat know that I probably do/have committed all of the eternal Snapchat sins. 

So today, it is time to right my wrongs. In my first of repentance, I thought I would draft a set of unwritten rules that I, and everyone, else should aim to abide by.

Here are your five Snapchat commandments, as outlined by me.

  1. Quality over quantity

I cannot stress this enough. Waking up on a Sunday morning to a 16-minute play-by-play of your Saturday night is probably worse than the hangover I am already sporting. Don’t get me wrong; snap away if the content is quality. But unfortunately, selfie after selfie does get a little repetitive.

  1. No lip-syncing thanks

Kylie Jenner, this one is directed at you. Forty-six seconds of you mouthing the words to a song in the car is not entertaining for me. Are you practising for an upcoming slot on Jimmy Fallon lip-sync battle? Probably not. Please stick to your cute dogs and amazing house thanks. 

  1. Concerts are to be seen, not snapped

While I am probably guilty of this one, it’s a real deal breaker for me. If the act were really that good, I probably would have bought a ticket myself. However it sort of does save me money, why go see Flight Facilities when I can just get a front row seat on my Snapchat? 

  1. Timing is everything

Ten seconds on breakfast versus one second on the adorable sausage dog puppy you saw on the street…which one do you think I care more about? Ensure your timings directly correlate to the level of interestingness that your images contain. If you’re looking 10/10 when you’re going out, I want to see it - but I don’t need to see 16 photos of it for 300 seconds.

  1. You are Picasso

Remember: Snapchat is first and foremost an artist’s medium. Well…maybe not, but those drawing tools exist for a reason people. I appreciate a well drawn-out depiction of you as a sunflower, or what you would look like if you were Harry Potter. Keep them coming please.

For a glowing example of the commandments in practice, follow 'fashionjournal' on Snapchat. You know you want to.

Leave a comment

Related

For when you're just not ready to delete.
It seriously makes me question the term ‘influencer’.
The 'fashion trend' is dead. Instagram killed it.
It responds to flash photography with an eloquent swear.
Just how cheaply can you do a Eurotrip?
OMG I love your green juice, where did you get it?
What do you wanna be when you grow up? I wanna work at Snapchat.
Because the treadmill does not compare to Beyoncé dance classes.
Help because we are freaking out right now.
Because we all need a little help when it comes to Boxing Day.
And other handy job application tips.
Because it can be really confusing out there.
A definitive guide to Adelaide's most Insta-worthy spots.
For those of you who share in this weird fascination.
Your favourite female mouse takes on fashion blogging.
Because it’s harder than it looks.
Follow these steps and you’ll officially be a blogger, just like everyone else.
LA does alright, if you do it right.
Choosing friends on regram probability, fame association, and comparative attractiveness.
Giving Sassy Girl a run for her money.
Who said you have to be good at art to be an artist?
The game according to Zachary The Label creative director, Effie Kats.
Some little known but big shot jobs in the industry.
Flat-laying is officially a sport.
A beginner's guide to Health Goth for those who need to catch up.
Our favourite fashion friendships of all time.
Keep up to date with the best of #LFW with these Instagrammers.
Because you shouldn't feel out of place, even when you can't afford it.
Because garage sales are no longer a thing.
Say hello to the non-model faces of Marc by Marc Jacobs 2015.
It's been a pretty spectacular year on the catwalk.