10/05/2016
For those with champagne taste on a passion pop budget.

Words by

Tara Smith

Maybe you haven’t been as thrifty with your money as you promised you would be this year. Maybe you have debts to think about or maybe you simply have champagne taste on a passion pop budget. 

Whatever it is, we don’t blame you. The old adage ‘cash rules everything around me’ has never sounded quite so true. 

For our friends (us) with empty pockets and rising debts, we’ve devised the ultimate get-rich-quick scheme. While working hard for the money is rewarding, there’s nothing like saving by being an absolute tightass.

Follow in our footsteps and you’re sure to be laughing all the way to the bank.

Ditch the vodka lime sodas, take up drinking beer

It turns out beer is a helluva lot cheaper than your average watered-down vodka lime soda. Plus, you can enjoy twice as much beer than vodka for the same price. Who knew? While this might mean your liver will cop it and you’ll need to wear spanx every time you go out, you’ll be doing your wallet a huge favour. Speaking of livers…

Sell your organs on the black market

Who really needs that second kidney?  Alternatively, another much safer option is to sell your unwanted clothes online. Lucky for you, we’ve already mapped out how to make it rain by doing just that.

Milk the precious student discount for all it’s worth

God bless whoever created the student discount. Cafes, movie cinemas, public transport and travel are just some of the many discounted options you can access just for being a useless uni student. We suggest heading over to Unidays for an extensive list of just how many discounts you can score (hint: it’s a lot). Student lyf. It’s not all bad. 

Eat dumplings every night of the week

Everyone loves dumplings and most importantly they’re super cheap and filling. We’re talking $8 for 15 dumplings in Chinatown. You could feed an entire family on that much (almost).

Limit your drinking between 5-7pm

AKA happy hour. You can drink like a king for two hours and maybe even treat yourself to a vodka lime soda. There’s even a nifty little app that tells you the different happy hour specials around your capital city. You’re welcome.

Attend every Bunnings sausage sizzle

Sure, Bunnings sells tools and building supplies. But what they’re really known for is their sausage sizzles. Every weekend you can line your stomach while lining the pockets of the less fortunate. Gold coin donation? Delicious. 

If you have it in you, become the tightass friend

Not everyone has the stomach for it, but there’s usually a reason these people are tightasses. Maybe if you had been a little bit more like your tightass friend, you wouldn’t be in this predicament. But hey, we’re not judging.

Become Insta-famous

Turns out all that social media narcissism can be pretty lucrative. While Kendall Jenner is reportedly valued between $125,000 to $300,000 per insta post, a top fashion blogger can earn between $5,000 and $25,000. And you’re out there doing it for free. A couple hundred thousand followers is all it takes. 

Live at home for as long as you can

Moving out is a total sham. Living turns out to be one huge, ongoing expense, which I never really thought about at home. While freedom is great, it’s also pretty great not having to worry about bills and rent and all that adult stuff. I miss the days when Mum and Dad paid my way and I actually had savings. 

Frequent the FJ Sales Guide

Shameless plug, but we’re here to help. Why pay full price for items like a chump when you can get it for much less? You can thank us later for never missing a sale again. Fill out your details below and treat yourself with all that saving you’ve done, you’ve earned it.



 

Leave a comment

Related

While stocks last.
June 23 until sold out.
Friends rule and drinks are fun. So let’s do this.
Because avocado smash is expensive AF.
Just how cheaply can you do a Eurotrip?
Now until the end of January.
Pop it in your basket ASAP before anxiety takes hold.
OFFERING UP TO 50 % OFF THE RRP OF SS15 PLUS OTHER BIG U.S BRANDS
Price start at $10. Nothing more than $40. Eep.
Re-issuing exclusive limited editions of his most iconic pieces.
Get your wallets out ladies.
Our fave pop culture fash hun is on sale!
For Melbourne's cool kids.
The accessories you need in your life.
Accessories designed locally.
Upgrade your winter wardrobe.
Retail therapy that's good for the heart.
Just a cool 80% off, no biggie.
Too many sales, not enough wardrobe space.
Up to 80% off Ginger & Smart and AKIN by GINGER & SMART
Prices start from $59.95. Gimme.
Check in, then check in again.
The Rodeo Show sale is here with up to 80% off.
Grab a bargain before they all vanish!
Buttery leather goodness.
The POLs are in, it's SALE time.
Snap up a bargain from the comfort of your own home.
Not a single item will cost more than a tenner.
If you love sales and supporting good causes then the Very Special Kids Fashion Sale on Saturday 22 November at the Malvern Town...
Dangerfield is having a 20% off full price sale, you're welcome.
Staple the label warehouse sale has arrived
Monk House Design have announced the dates for their annual studio sale.
Get your shopping shoes ready because it's sale time!
Scarves, glorious scarves!
If you’re into colourful prints and want to brighten up your winter wardrobe, we’ll probably see you this weekend.
Wonder of wonder, miracle of miracles!
Forget a backyard jumble sale, The Lover Jumble Sale is one you won't want to miss.
Strateas.Carlucci are having their first ever studio sale - hurrah!
Bass-eeek, bas-ik, or base-ic...however you like to say it (keep in mind the proper pronunciation is base-ic), the iconic...
All stock must go at this weekend's massive Dangerfield warehouse sale
In case you needed more reasons to go shopping, TALULAH are having their Melbourne warehouse sale this Saturday.
There aren’t many stores that are as loyal to Australian fashion design as Alice Euphemia in the Cathedral Arcade.
Cheap Monday wants to sell you stuff for cheaps.
Melbourne institution Alpha60 are having a sale! 30% off all their first winter drop.
Guys, sales this good don’t come around too often. We are excited to announce that Green with Envy, and iconic brand Nicholas are...