How to make your shower sex better

Steamy, yes. Good, not always.

You’ve either heard or experienced a shower sex horror story by now, and if you’re like me you’ve wondered if it’s actually fun for anyone. Or is everyone just pretending it’s great when it’s really not?

With a few failed attempts and many just downright uncomfortable shower sex scenarios under my belt – think slipping over on wet tiles, leg cramps from manoeuvring awkward positions and copping shower water in my eyes – I’ve wondered if it’s maybe something I’m doing wrong.

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It’s never been that enjoyable for me or my partners and it’s definitely not something I would think about trying out with any potential partners. And although I’ve never had an overwhelmingly positive experience, according to the internet, amazing shower sex is a possibility.

So, to bust some shower sex myths, I called in for backup from a pro, sexologist and sexuality educator Lauren French, who knows a thing or two about making the most of these slippery situations. I tapped into Lauren’s knowledge of all things sex to get 411 on shower time to find out how (or if) it could be any better.

Why have sex in the shower? Are there any pleasure-related benefits?

Shower sex is never going to look like what you see in the movies. You’re going to get water in your eye, hair in your face and you might be spending most of the time making sure you don’t fall over! So, let’s be realistic about steaming up that shower.

Showers can be a fun place to fool around and it’s a great opportunity to involve some light temperature play with the water. We might also feel a bit more sensual under the water and who doesn’t love having someone there to wash our backs (and fronts!).

What are the risks of shower sex?

All the normal risks to sex are still there but you’ve also got to be aware of your environment! Mainly, the risk of slipping. The shower isn’t the place to try that new circus-like position you’ve read about. Keep it slow, sensual and with both feet on the ground.

Any tips for making shower sex better?

The best way to make things less awkward is to acknowledge it’s going to get awkward! You’re allowed to laugh and be playful – it’s not going to ruin the moment. Try not to make it too serious, follow the pleasure and relax into each other and if something funny happens, laugh!

Is water a lubricant or do you need lube in the shower?

Let’s say it loud for the people in the back row: WATER IS NOT A LUBRICANT! At all. So no, the water in the shower is nowhere near enough.

Any other tips for enhancing both your and your partner’s experience during a shower session?

If you’re in the shower, don’t just try and do what you do in bed under the water. You’ve got a whole new environment to play with! Use those cold tiles and experiment with how you can use the water to enhance and add to your pleasure.

What do you recommend for shower sex after-care?

If you play in the shower, you might actually need a shower after. Look after each other’s bodies and don’t skip your usual aftercare. Still debrief, cuddle and share each other’s space. Just maybe dry off before getting under the sheets!

This article was originally published on January 20, 2022.

For the best positions to try in the shower, head here.