“Snail girl era”: Why I’m slowing down and choosing to be happy rather than busy

“The snail girl goes slow, retreats when she needs and follows the path at her own pace.”

While working, I often get struck with what I call a ‘hot take’. It will float into one side of my brain, and once it’s bounced around in there for a minute or so, I’m often compelled to share it.

In this particular instance, I grabbed my phone and texted my friend Beci: ‘Hot take for the week, my inner girl boss is dead and my ‘snail girl’ era has begun’. In my mind, the snail girl goes slow, retreats when she needs and follows the path at her own pace. She is the opposite of how I’ve felt for the past few years.

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I started my brand Hello Sisi in 2018. I was so excited to be making something that others wanted and couldn’t believe it was taking off. I quit my job and all of a sudden, was consumed with being a girl boss. I became addicted to it – growing my brand, platform and audience.

As a non-stop-anxious people pleaser, I decided the easiest way to feel good was to be perceived as successful. Nothing enables the ability to look booked, busy and successful like social media does. I was logged on and posting, taking pictures and messaging around the clock. Each day I was 1,000 likes away from the next stepping stone.

Hello Sisi quickly became my number one priority. As Cady Heron says in Mean Girls, it was my “word vomit” subject. It would sit there at the back of my throat and I would somehow turn any idea or conversation into something related to the business. When COVID hit, I decided to make a website after far too many years of the ‘DM to order’ system.

(Just want to put this out there – don’t be silly like me. Make a website right away. This will stop you from losing DMs like me and waking up at 1am realising you forgot to reply to @cherryprincess81_.) So when COVID hit, I made a Big Cartel store and it was a game-changer. The orders came flooding in.

With nothing else to do but bake bread and walk along the Merri Creek trail, I was so happy to be busy and working. The lockdowns began to lift and all of a sudden, we were back to life in the ‘newfound normal’. I continued to make, post, like and share.

It’s now the second half of 2023, and just over five years since I started the business. The cracks are beginning to appear. Cracks you might assume are bad, but not always – these are cracks in what I once thought was everything. New light is starting to shine through and this light is slowly starting to dull the overwhelming sparkle of my girl boss persona.

Also, I need to say this is just how I’m feeling right now. To all the girl bosses out there, I’m forever in awe of what you do. It’s just as these cracks have started to appear, I’ve noticed that maybe in this life, we don’t need to achieve huge success to give what we do meaning.

I sat across from my therapist Jen maybe a month ago now and said “Jen, I’m worried that I’m losing drive. I just don’t care so much about the end goal anymore, I just want to live a happy life”. She stared at me and said, “Sisi, I hate to sound condescending but maybe you’re just growing up”.

 

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A post shared by Beci Orpin (@beciorpin)

And you know what? Maybe that’s it. Maybe the snail girl era is me growing up, but I’m just not sure that’s the case. This snail-girl mentality has now been swirling in my head, and it’s giving me this funny feeling of calm. It’s a new feeling, that’s for sure.

Snail girl, for me, is not about a holiday or stopping work completely. I love what I do and the amazing community that has supported my brand. It’s just about taking that time to remember to not be as hard on myself, to have a work-life balance and to stop comparing my journey to others.

I’m aware my ability to slow down and take a step back comes from a place of financial privilege – not everyone can just ‘hit pause’ on their professional lives. In saying that, you can incorporate a little snail girl into your life without stopping the cash flow. Instead,  think of it as a time to put yourself first, set personal and professional boundaries and protect your peace. Remember, it’s okay to say no sometimes!

A snail girl takes her time and creates to create. The speed at which everything is put out into the world is just getting faster, but she doesn’t care. She’s running her own race, and maybe that race isn’t going anywhere but home and back to bed. I want to hopefully hold on to this new freedom and take it into the next chapter of my business.

The next chapter means I’m slower and kinder to myself. I’ve had an internal monologue of doubt and fear of ‘not being good enough’ for a really long time. Sometimes I have a good idea, sometimes I have a great idea and other times I just stare at the wall and think ‘Wow, I’m a one-trick pony’.

That’s life, and we’re all doing the best we can. So I guess all I’m saying is if you’re feeling like me and you’re ready to hang up a version of yourself you no longer resonate with and unlock a new character, I’ll share snail girl with anyone.

You can make it your own. Let’s do it. Let’s just say “You know what? This has been fun, but I’ve got places to be. I’ve got slower places to be”. Let’s lead with an outlook that keeps us happy, rather than busy.

For more on slowing down, head here.