Is workplace gossip actually good for us?

Spilling the tea on spilling the tea.

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Networking, talking shop, speculating, debriefing, strategising and sharing information. These all sound like reasonable ways to communicate at work, right? What about social climbing, gossiping, harping on, overanalysing, scheming and dishing? These sound more like an HR meeting waiting to happen.

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However, despite some of these words being almost interchangeable in practice, the latter are often attributed to women. And the biggest casualty of this double standard? Gossip.

Everyone does it, everyone is impacted by it and almost everyone has denied doing it. But gossip is not an intrinsically negative (and certainly not intrinsically female) social practice. In fact, gossip is thought to have evolved as a social tool for fostering cooperation, strengthening social bonds, and helping humans navigate complex social networks.

To find out more about gossip and how it manifests in a work setting, we spoke to behavioural scientist and research associate at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam, Dr Elena Martinescu.

“There are a few broad categories of motives that ‘drive’ gossip behaviour,” says Dr Martinescu. “These are: to seek and validate information about other people in one’s social environment, this can be very useful in understanding who is trustworthy and who is not; to influence others, for example, by sharing information people can help protect a colleague or friend from being hurt by someone else, or can share information that puts themselves in a positive light; and to vent emotions and bond with others.”

Depending on the context, some gossip motives may be stronger than others. For instance, in a workplace with high uncertainty, employees might gossip to vent frustrations or build supportive social bonds. Or, when strong competition exists, gossip may be used to undermine rivals. Dr Martinescu’s research also shows that power dynamics play a key role: peers tend to gossip with one another to exchange information and bond, while gossip with superiors often aims to exert informal influence.

If the phrase ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’ is echoing in your mind, you might be surprised to learn that gossip can serve a functional purpose. Dr Martinescu provides an example where gossip is shared to protect others, such as when it warns colleagues about someone who fails to meet their responsibilities or who behaves unethically.

“Gossip stories provide rich and context-specific information that may also help individuals compare themselves with others and understand what they do well or how they could improve,” she says.

Several situational factors shape the nature and frequency of workplace gossip, such as power dynamics, competition for resources, the prominence of social norms, uncertainty, and contextual cues – like the difference between after-work drinks and a formal boardroom meeting. However, not all of these conditions foster healthy gossip.

While gossip can effectively share information and strengthen relationships, it also harbours a dark side that can unravel trust and breed conflict. “Malicious gossip can make people feel less socially included and less psychologically safe in the workplace. Because those targeted by it are not present and cannot defend themselves, their reputation may be severely damaged,” Dr Martinescu says.

This type of interaction – toxic and ill-intentioned – is often what comes to mind when we think of gossip and it certainly warrants attention if a conversation takes a damaging turn. However, gossip is sometimes unfairly labelled as malicious when spoken by women, even if they are engaging in the same types of communication as their male colleagues. There’s also no evidence to support the stereotype that women gossip more frequently or in more detrimental ways at work.

“As far as I know, there is no research showing that gossip is more prevalent among women than men in the workplace,” says Dr Martinescu. “In fact, I published a study earlier this summer that investigated gossip among truck drivers (who were all men), and in this environment, gossip was abundant and had a key role in helping them cope with the emotional and instrumental challenges of their job.”

A 2019 study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science found that men and women engage equally in gossip for about 52 minutes per day. Another study found that women are slightly more likely to engage in gossip about social lives and relationships, while men may gossip about work-related matters and hierarchies.

Women have historically been painted as the harbingers of intrigue for many reasons, one of which is to keep them out of the public and professional sphere. Labelling women’s conversations as “gossip” trivialises women’s communication styles and interests, implicitly suggesting that their thoughts, opinions, and social interactions are unimportant or harmful.

Through being historically relegated to domestic spaces, women’s interactions have largely developed to revolve around family and community relationships and as women only began to enter the workforce en masse in the Western world in the 20th century, these communication styles, expectations, and social norms were already deeply entrenched.

Women may use gossip as a professional influence tactic because they are often constrained by societal norms that discourage them from being overtly assertive. Research suggests that women face social penalties when they exhibit behaviours associated with assertiveness, ambition, or self-promotion – traits that are often expected and rewarded in men. Gossip can serve as an indirect way to achieve influence and power while avoiding overt confrontations or appearing too direct.

According to Dr Martinescu, gossip is difficult to manage directly, as it usually happens without the target’s awareness. “I think leaders should abstain from gossiping for their own benefit and should discourage their followers from doing so when they believe others gossip to them for self-interest.”

As always, nuance is the key. Making up rumours, betraying people’s trust or being hurtful and cruel about someone behind their back, especially in a way that embarrasses them or harms their wellbeing, is almost never constructive and can lead to unnecessary hurt. Use your discretion and follow your gut – know when to share, when to listen, and when to walk away.

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