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Australia’s Next Top Model Season 9, Episode 9

The girls head to New York to meet Coco Rocha and Nigel Barker. Living the dream.

We’re down to the final four. Brittany. Jess. Lucy. Alex.

Enter Jen in her impossibly high heels and inappropriate outfit again. The girls feel so #blessed that they’ve come this far in the competition but when they find out they’re heading to New York this week, that hashtag #BLESSED gets capitalised.

“We need some tissues. They’re all crying!”

What an observation Jen.

Also this (accompanied by a montage of the girls in Times Square looking up with their mouths wide open).

Alex Perry comes along for the ride and they meet him on their hotel rooftop. It’s very cold so Alex Perry decides to channel Pitbull-winter-chic with an all-black-errythang outfit and some aviators.

The girls get up to a lot in New York. For their challenge, they have to attend two go-sees. One at Elle magazine and another at Swarovski. The winner of the challenge will feature in Swarovski’s international magazine, Multifacets, and win $2000 worth of jewellery from the brand.

The Elle fashion news director, Anne Slowey, was TOUGH. Alex did not impress because she said her favourite designer is Geevenchee.

“Givenchy,” Anne corrects.

After Anne gives a little spiel about how Alex needs to do some homework on how to pronounce designer names, Alex then asks a very dumb question. Forgive her, she’s nervous.

“Is there one way to pronounce them all?”

“Yes there’s one way to pronounce them all and there’s something called the internet and that is your best bet.”

Ouch.

Anne wasn’t a fan of Jess either. Jess was 15 minutes late and stumbled in her heels when she demonstrated her walk. She was a bit meh about Lucy as well because she didn’t show a huge range of emotion.

Brittany though. Anne LOVED her. After Brittany told her that she used to drive bobcats and excavators, it literally blew Anne’s mind and she could not comprehend.

“The fact that you’re an excavator is the best story I’ve ever heard in my entire career.”

OH MAN. Entire career people. This woman lives in such an insulated world that the concept of a construction worker making a career change is the most mind-blowing thing she’s ever heard in her life.

Swarovski was equally awkward. Lucy accidentally made a reference to diamonds instead of crystals and Swarovski’s global creative director, Nathalie Colin, was actually pretty rude when they were taking test shots.

“So do you find it difficult to have different pose… different emotion or it’s…?”

Er wot. Give her direction! Tell Lucy to mix it up. Don’t awkwardly allude to it. These people GAH.

Nathalie was not impressed with Jess because she was 30 minutes late. She had trouble reading the map and got SUPER stressed. It was awful to watch. Alex was ok but apparently didn’t show enough personality.

And then Brittany swoops in and woos them. She won the challenge, which was pretty validating for her because she always gets so anxious talking to clients. The girls heard their feedback directly from IMG’s vice president, David Cunningham, and the clients agreed that Brittany was the most memorable.

The next day they met COCO ROCHA for a lesson in posing. Seriously, how did the producers tee this up?

Alex did particularly well with her deranged psycho faces.

But we haven’t even gotten to the best part. (I know, who could be better than Coco Rocha amirite?)

Nigel Barker. That’s who. The girls got to wear some pretty conceptual weird outfits, pose like Coco Rocha on the streets of New York, and be photographed by Nigel Barker.

His reveal was amazeee. He hopped out of a yellow cab, said “Hello ladies,” followed by “How do you do?” and winked. WHATTAGUY.

Alex did pretty well in her space-geisha outfit. Jess took a little while to warm up and almost broke her ankle in her gangsta platform sneakers. Lucy couldn’t connect her body with the expression in her face and Brittany was super nervous and had trouble getting into it.

They flew back to Sydney for eliminations. Coco and Nigel were a bit too cool to head back to measly Australia so David Cunningham joined the judging panel instead.

Jen revealed that it was a double elimination. Only two girls would make it to the final, not the usual three.

David was a pretty good addition to the panel because he provided insight that Jen and Alex didn’t really think of. Everyone thought Alex’s photo was phenomenal but all David saw was a pretty girl in a big outfit squatting next to a fire hydrant. He wasn’t wowed by Brittany’s photo and could see the disconnect in Lucy’s. He liked Jess’ photo but Alex Perry and Jen thought her body looked strange.

SO. THE FINAL TWO. Brittany and Lucy made it through. Jess went home and Alex missed out by one point. They took it well but it was sad 🙁 Especially with Lorde’s ‘Team’ playing in the background.

Not really sure what’s happening next week. Obviously we’ll find out who wins Australia’s Next Top Model and it looks like the public have no say. It’s all up to Tyra Banks.

“The fate of both of you all is in my hands.”

Hoping for an outburst like this next week but it’s not looking likely.

fox8.tv/shows/australias-next-top-model

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