7 handy finance apps for those of us who can’t save for shit

Help me, I’m poor.

If you are reading this, you are terrible with money. Welcome. This is a safe place.

I’ll go first: Hello, I’m Alyce, and I can’t save for shit. I try very hard — I follow a strict budgeting system, I have multiple bank accounts and I give myself an allowance each week — but as soon as I save a bit, I feel rich and shout everyone tequila shots.

I need help, and seeing as I’m a millennial with a full-blown phone addiction, I seek help in iPhone apps, rather than meeting with an actual finance professional.

Here’s what I’ve found in my research in case you need some help too.  

Quit That

Quit That is a basic app that does one thing and one thing only: rubs in your face how much money you waste on your vice. Want to give up your morning coffee? Enter a few details and Quit That will show you how you many minutes you’ve been clean for, and just how much money you’ve saved. Motivating AF.

Raiz

Raiz (formerly Acorns) is perfect if you don’t have enough money to actually save… or you’re too lazy to manually do it yourself. When you purchase something, Raiz will round up the amount you’ve paid and transfer the leftovers to a savings goal of your choice. In 2000 years, you could pay for a European holiday, just by rounding up your lunch every day.

Splitwise

I think we can all agree that splitting bills is the worst. There’s always that one friend that leaves the dinner without paying, or that housemate that swears they paid rent when they definitely didn’t. It often ends in angry text messages, friendship break-ups and someone’s belongings sprawled across the lawn. Splitwise is a clever lil’ app designed to save you from this; you can log in with your friends and keep track of bills, group trips, random IOUs and anything else you’re going to forget.

MVelopes

Remember when you used to pinch money from your mum’s purse and it’d be stuffed with envelopes? MVelopes uses the same basic envelope budgeting system to help you plan and track your household or personal budget. Set up virtual envelopes for all of your expenses — rent, groceries, wine — link your bank account and assign amounts to each.

Spaceship Voyager

Spaceship Voyager probably didn’t want to write ‘investing for dummies’ on its App Store profile because it doesn’t make us feel very good, but let’s be honest: that’s what it is. You can start with an investment of $5, choose a portfolio that suits you, and then sit back and dream about the superyacht you’re going to buy when you become a billionaire.

You Need A Budget

It feels like You Need A Budget is being a tad aggressive with its title, but I have to admit it’s a very simple and handy app for people that do Need A Budget. Basically, it’s a budgeting, personal finance and expense tracker that works in four steps: Build a realistic budget, import transactions from your bank account, set goals and map progress, and adjust your budget when expenses come outta nowhere.

Pocketbook

Have you ever dreamed of being one of those people who have their shit together? You know, the kind that don’t spend their entire pay in one night? If so, Pocketbook might be the app for you. It teaches you to be generally *better with money* by making it easy to track, budget and save. Be warned though: when it connects your bank account, it will tell you what you spend all your money on, and you will cry.