Sex on screen: The best erotic films to watch, according to a sex therapist

“I intellectualise sex in my work as a therapist, but these films explore sex from an aesthetic point of view.”

As a sexologist, I often find the exploration of eroticism and intimacy in film can offer interesting insights into human desire and connection. It’s a completely different lens to mine – I intellectualise sex in my work as a therapist, but these films explore sex from an aesthetic point of view.

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Cinema also has a unique way of capturing the complexities of eroticism, blending visual storytelling with emotional depth. There is such a special place in my heart for erotic cinema. Here are my all-time favourites.

Bitter Moon (1992)

Directed by Roman Polanski, Bitter Moon is a provocative exploration of a tumultuous relationship. The film follows the story of a writer, his wife, and an enigmatic couple who recount their passionate and destructive romance. With its intense narrative and rich character studies, Bitter Moon examines the darker side of desire and the ways in which passion can both connect and isolate individuals. Polanski’s direction ensures the film remains both challenging and thought-provoking, offering a deep dive into the complexities of erotic obsession. 

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)

Stanley Kubrick’s final film Eyes Wide Shut is a masterful exploration of sexual desire and the secrets that lie beneath the surface of seemingly ordinary lives. Starring Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman, the film follows a Manhattan doctor who embarks on a surreal journey into a world of hidden sexual rituals. Kubrick’s meticulous craftsmanship and the film’s dreamlike quality make it a fascinating study of the intersections between eroticism, fantasy and reality. Eyes Wide Shut also challenges viewers to confront their own perceptions of sexuality and intimacy. Incredible film! 

Love (2015)

Gaspar Noé’s Love is a visceral and unflinching portrayal of a passionate yet troubled relationship. The film follows Murphy and Electra as their love affair evolves into a tumultuous and explicit exploration of physical and emotional connection. Noé’s unrestrained approach to eroticism and his use of 3D technology create an immersive experience that is both provocative and deeply emotional. Love invites viewers to examine the raw and often painful dimensions of romantic relationships.

The Dreamers (2003)

Bernardo Bertolucci’s The Dreamers is a richly sensual film set against the backdrop of the 1968 student riots in France. The story revolves around an American student who becomes involved with a French sibling duo who have their own unique relationship with cinema and each other. The film is a celebration of both eroticism and the power of film itself, blending intellectual curiosity with physical intimacy. The Dreamers offers a compelling look at how erotic desires can intersect with personal and political upheaval.

Call Me By Your Name (2017)

Luca Guadagnino’s Call Me By Your Name is a beautifully crafted coming-of-age romance that explores the delicate and transformative nature of first love. Set in the Italian countryside, the film captures the burgeoning romance between 17-year-old Elio and his father’s research assistant, Oliver. The film’s evocative cinematography and poignant storytelling offer a tender examination of the complexities of a queer sexual awakening and the bittersweet nature of summer romance.

Circumstance (2011)

Maryam Keshavarz’s Circumstance is a compelling drama that examines the intersection of sexuality, politics and personal freedom in contemporary Iran. The film follows two teenage girls who navigate their growing attraction to each other amid a restrictive and oppressive environment. Circumstance is a powerful exploration of the ways in which erotic desire can challenge societal norms and personal boundaries, offering a poignant look at the struggle for self-expression and love.

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