I had dinner with a group of strangers, here’s how it went

Mindful food, natural wine, blossoming friendships and a stranger’s playlists.

Whether you’re single, struggling to make or maintain friendships or simply choosing to spend more time with yourself, being alone can be daunting. After my six-year relationship came to an end last year, I realised that being alone was something I wasn’t very familiar with and I found myself struggling with loneliness.

But instead of filling this void with my comfort people, I decided to lean into it and actively put myself in situations that challenged me. Originally, this was meant to be an article about going clubbing alone but the wintery weather saw me fighting off a cold.

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I decided it was best not to push my body to endure a whole night of partying, particularly on my own. That night, as I was scrolling Instagram, a post popped up about a communal dining experience hosted by Our Table; it seemed like the perfect, wholesome alternative to my solo clubbing experience, so I booked a ticket for the coming Sunday.

I told my friends about it but informed them they weren’t allowed to come – I wanted to go alone. I also wanted them to know I was unavailable that night to avoid an invite that could sway me to choose my friends over a group of complete strangers.

As I got ready that Sunday, I realised that having no friends to coordinate outfits with meant I was unsure whether I’d be over or underdressed for the occasion. Feeling nervous but excited, I jumped into an Uber and headed to the Copenhagen-inspired wine bar Fraek Vin in Richmond where the event was being held.

I was one of the first to arrive so it was a little strange but I found my named menu card at the wishbone-shaped table and waited for others to arrive. Moments later, Molly, the Head Chef and Founder of Our Table, came into the space and warmly welcomed me. We chatted about the concept of Our Table and her calming energy and enthusiasm helped me settle into the experience.

Connecting with strangers

As the beautiful, locally sourced dishes were being brought out, the intimate room filled with the chatter of strangers. Turning to the people to our side, we started with the small questions, slowly learning the names and occupations of those around us.

Everyone was open and willing to spend their time meeting someone new. From a group of 15, myself and one other were the only people who had come alone; everyone else brought either a partner or a friend. So there were moments when those individuals turned their attention to their person and I was left in silent observation of the interactions around me.

Although I didn’t mind this, it was hard not to feel slightly uncomfortable. Suddenly I was highly aware of where my eyes were looking and what my body was doing and I wasn’t sure how to re-engage myself into the conversation. The temptation to pull out my phone and give myself something to do washed over me and I had to remind myself that feeling uncomfortable was the whole point of this experience – I needed to learn how to sit with it.

I was glad when a girl from across the table beckoned me over to join their discussion. We spoke about relationships and the fear that comes with embarking on major life changes. We laughed about the discovery of mutual connections and congratulated one another on our career successes. As dessert was about to be brought out, our gorgeous host Molly asked us to be brave and find a spot at the table beside someone we hadn’t had the chance to speak to yet. She reminded us that on the back of our menus was a selection of thought-provoking questions to ask our neighbours if we got stuck.

With new faces by my side, I found myself laughing and making suggestions for a quintessential Melbourne weekend as we devoured our chocolate mousse with lemon myrtle oil. Then the lovely Flora, who was the only other solo diner, told us about her stranger playlists where she asks strangers for song suggestions to add to playlists like ‘Songs that remind you of your father’ or ‘Your go-to comfort song’.

I fell in love with this idea. What a beautiful way to break the ice with strangers while discovering new music. I asked Flora if I could steal the idea and she agreed under one condition; I had to share mine with her. So I promised I would, and we exchanged details.

Overall, the night was a beautiful success. From the stunning European-inspired interior of Fraek Vin, to the warm and welcoming Molly, whose dishes were thoughtfully curated and made from fresh, locally sourced ingredients, to the inspiring conversations I had with strangers. My advice for anyone interested in partaking in a similar experience is to set aside your fears and doubts and do it. You don’t need to have someone to do it with.

It’s far less scary than you think it will be, and you’ll most likely leave with sore cheeks from smiling and a phone full of new contacts. Just be open to new interactions and brave enough to put yourself forward and try something new.

Keep up to date with future Our Table dining experiences here.