How do you feel about PDA? 13 Fashion Journal readers weigh in

“As far as passionate smooching goes, please save that for the bedroom.”

If Shawn Mendes and Camilla Cabello taught us anything, it’s that public displays of affection (PDA) can be uncomfortable sometimes. Granted, love does make us do crazy things – particularly in that ephemeral relationship honeymoon phase when our oxytocin ‘love hormones‘ are running rampant. But on the outside of the love bubble, passionate PDA can warrant visceral reactions from onlookers.

Looking for more thought-provoking reads? Try our Life section.

So is it okay to suck face in the open air? To find out, we asked anonymous Fashion Journal readers to share their honest thoughts on PDA. Scroll on to see what they had to say.

Jaya*, 21, she/her

I feel like PDA is actually such a nice feeling. When you like someone and they’re able to openly express that in public, honestly, it’s the cutest feeling. I feel like I’m super shy… but when someone is forward and is able to physically show they’re into you in front of the world, it’s just cute. I feel like as someone looking on at PDA… it’s a warm reminder that love is all around, it’s human nature and it’s the reason we are all here. I think it should be embraced. Hopeless romantic energy.

Abbey*, 26, she/her

PDA can make me feel jealous. Like ‘Wow, I wish that was me’. I want someone who wants to kiss me so badly that they can’t wait ’til we get home. It’s kind of romantic. I’m single (obviously).

Yulia*, 20, she/her

I think it’s fine in small doses, like when I’m with my friends and they hold hands or they have a hand on a leg… but I don’t need to see people swapping saliva in public regularly. Like a kiss here and there is fine, but more than that is too much.

Louise*, 26, she/her

I’m not a hugely affectionate person myself and never was one to hold hands in public until I met my partner. Aside from that, I’m not one to kiss and hug in public. Not for any real reason, I’m just not super comfortable doing it. I think seeing couples being touchy in public is fine to an extent, but as far as passionate smooching goes, please save that for the bedroom.

Fatima*, 33, she/her

99 per cent of the time, it’s sexy. Whether it’s a handhold, a cheeky hand on the bum or a full-on pash, I’m happy to participate or observe. It makes me happy to see other people happy. If seeing PDA makes someone uncomfortable, that’s something they have to work on with themselves. My only caveat is that sexy PDA may not be great in certain situations (i.e. at a funeral or in front of Nan).

Clara*, 29, she/her

I personally love it. I get all giddy when I see couples smooching. I think there is a limit where you can evidently make people uncomfortable – maybe if the exchange is very lengthy, or the affection is becoming more sexual rather than intimate. But I say go for it.

Kate*, 24, she/her

I used to squirm at the thought of kissing in public or any form of PDA, but that was also because of where I grew up (South Asia) and realised I was just dating a lot of people I wasn’t interested in, lol. Now I’m seeing an amazing person, I could not care less about what anyone says or thinks cause I’m so in the zone and in love.

Esther*, 24, she/her

When my high school students do it, it absolutely disgusts me. Please don’t make out in my workplace. When they start getting too cuddly I feel really uncomfortable, I didn’t get into this line of work to see minors get handsy. My partner and I hold hands or hug. The rest is more personal and private for us.

Leticia*, 33, she/her

My thoughts surrounding PDA have altered over time as I’ve found myself in a long-term, committed relationship. PDA used to completely gross me out, likely because something I so desperately wanted (secure, reciprocal love) was being flaunted in front of me.

Now I’m like, it’s cute. Granted, I don’t need to see someone seconds away from reproducing, but some kisses, cheeky grabs and the like are all things I think are very welcome in my world. Elderly people holding hands and having little romantic pecks is the most heartwarming thing in existence, and I refuse to hear otherwise.

Naomi*, 26, she/her

It depends on the context. If they are drunk patrons, then it generally makes me feel uncomfortable because people are sloppy and disrespectful. Sometimes, being in the presence of PDA feels somewhat like forced involvement. I think if after they makeout, they pause to check who’s looking, then I’d rather not see it.

Especially if it’s a straight couple, there’s something far more obscene in that case. That sounds like I’m okay with it as a voyeur without their consent. But if it’s in public, it surely is consensual to look. Perhaps not to stare though. If I’m not at work and not forced to look and people are expressing their love openly, I think it’s cute.

If it’s clearly a mutual kink for couples it’s also funny and nice. I think I just feel annoyed with it at a workplace because I’m somewhat trapped so it feels inconsiderate to subject people in hospo to that.

Gemma*, 21, she/her

I find major PDA uncomfortable – whether I’m involved in it or not. Things like hand-holding or the occasional kiss or hug I think are fine. If it’s a group hangout, I generally think couples should make an effort to engage in the group conversation.

Briar*, 20, she/her

I am definitely an affectionate person with my partner, however, PDA is something that makes me feel a little uncomfortable. I think it mainly stems from how I’ve been brought up – in a family that doesn’t really show affection in public. I think this is also a cultural thing. Coming from an Asian family, most of my Asian friends have similar experiences of not having parents or grandparents that show PDA.

This is just from my experience and I am not saying that this is the same for all Asians. That being said, I do show affection to my boyfriend in public because I don’t want to go out of my way to avoid his hugs/kisses (basically shrug him off), if that makes sense. As our relationship has progressed, I have become more comfortable with PDA but would say a peck or hug is as much as it goes in public.

Frida*, 25, she/her

I used to strongly despise PDA. I found it performative, unnecessary and gross. It gave me the biggest ick. To some extent, I still feel icky about it. But I am currently dating someone and through feeling all the feels, I’m realising I actually need to unlearn some of my hate towards PDA.

Did my internalised disgust of PDA stem from being a slightly cynical single? I still don’t feel obliged to fully make out in public, but I have noticed small displays of affection becoming more natural to me, less cringy and even wanting them. Perhaps micro-moments of PDA can even be beautiful.

For more thoughts on PDA, head here.