Two Melbourne creatives have joined forces to create an immersive and flirty IRL dating and friendship-making event

“There are always more brilliant people out there to meet – we can get really trapped in a scarcity mindset, and that holds us back.”

In the era of dating apps, it feels like IRL meet-cutes only exist in romcoms and enthusiastically told anecdotes about friends of friends. “This couple my coworker knows met in the canned goods aisle at the IGA down the street,” the story usually goes. “Their first date went for 24 hours, just sipping wine and eating pre-cooked lentils by the spoonful.”

When you’re in the trenches of the online dating world, it’s hard to grapple with the idea that people don’t just meet anymore. Or do they? Described as a ‘flirty, dirty and immersive dating experience’, In Heat is the upcoming Melbourne event giving friends, lovers, singles and polyamorous people the chance to connect, face to face.

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Presented by Feeld, Figr and Orb Oils and created by the Co-Founder of Figr, Eloise O’Sullivan, and Fashion Journal’s very own Editor, Cait Emma Burke, In Heat will take place on December 2 at Fitzroy’s A-n Studios. Below, the pair speak on what we can expect from In Heat, and how the event was informed by their own experiences as single women.

Can you tell us a little about what In Heat is, and how the idea for the event came to fruition?

Eloise: In Heat has been set up as an event to meet and mingle with like-minded people, surrounded in a space with art, music and conversation prompts along with free drinks at the beginning of summer. I met Emma Smith, the founder of Orb Oils, through speed dating and we instantly connected. We knew we wanted to collaborate in the future, and Cait has been a firecracker in my life since meeting.

We have similar interests in dating and have expanded our working relationship by co-hosting Feeld’s social events with more exciting things in the future. This event evolved from conversations we had surrounding the success and popularity of Figr speed dating events. We had an influx of people wanting to come, but not the capacity to host it.

 

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Cait: When Eloise told me about her idea for In Heat, I was immediately keen to be involved. We share a lot of common interests and are particularly passionate about getting people off their phones and into a room together; that’s where the real magic can happen. Dating is tough these days, and everyone I know who’s single is feeling massive fatigue from it. This event is intended to act as an antidote to that lethargy.

Was In Heat informed by your own dating experiences? How?

E: As we are all single, we have selfishly created an event we all want to participate in.

C: For sure. There’s a real desire among most people I know for in-person connection, even better if it’s flirty and fun (who doesn’t love a little flirt?). And, as Eloise said, we’re both single and so are a lot of people we know, so if we can help facilitate some new romantic matches or gorgeous friendships, then it’s all worth it.

What advice would you give to people who might feel hesitant about putting themselves out there?

C: Someone said to me a while ago that dating is really just a numbers game. At the time I thought it was a little crass, but recently I’ve been putting myself out on the dating scene more than I ever have in my life and it’s been a real revelation. I think dating with high standards but low expectations is the way I’m navigating it now that I’m 30.

If something doesn’t work out, you usually still get something good out of it – whether it’s an interesting conversation, discovering a great new restaurant or spicy sex. And having an abundance mindset is important; if someone’s leaving you on read or ghosting you after a few really great dates, don’t be afraid to line up a few new dates with other people to take your mind off it.

There are always more brilliant people out there to meet – we can get really trapped in a scarcity mindset, and that holds us back. Reframing the way we think about dating and relationships is key. I no longer view something as a failure just because it only lasted for a few weeks or months. You’re learning more about yourself and what you do and don’t like each time you date someone new. Plus, it can just be really silly and fun.

Who is In Heat for, and what can attendees expect from the day?

E: It’s for friends, lovers, singles or polyamorous people to come to. Treat it as a day party with activities and purposeful connections at its centre. We have an incredible line-up: the daylight session includes a performance by Maya Irving with Sophia Argy on the decks.

The moonlight session has a performance by Katherine Hegeman (aka Ballet School Dropout) with Minimale Fatale on the decks, along with an interactive installation by Tanya Cubric called ‘7 Minutes in Heaven’ which explores consent and the sexiness of it.

[Attendees can enjoy] all of this plus free drinks for both sessions by our incredible sponsors Non, Heaps Normal, Bodriggy, Melbourne Martini and Bobby… [and] all ticket holders will go into the running to win door prizes by Self Care Originals, Happie Holl and High Tide.

How will the event encourage connection and discovery? How can attendees get the most from the event?

E: Be vulnerable, and show up. Everyone who is attending is in the same boat.

C: I’m MCing the event, and there’ll be spicy and fun conversational prompts I’ll be encouraging attendees to engage with, plus there’ll be great music and art which I think always fosters an exciting and open vibe. As Eloise said, just be yourself and don’t overthink it; everyone there is ready to connect, whether that’s as friends, lovers or a one-night stand. Who knows what’s in store?

Get your tickets to In Heat here.