A sex writer’s ins and outs for 2026

It’s cool to be chalant and chivalrous.

Laura Roscioli is a sex writer based in Melbourne. Her fortnightly column on Fashion Journal is here to make sex (and the conversations around it) more accessible and open-minded. She believes that the best learnings come from lived experience, and she’s here to share hers — and other people’s — with you. You can follow Laura on Instagram at @lauraroscioli.

I’ve got to say, 2025 was one of the most interesting years I’ve ever witnessed for sex and relationships in my job as a sex writer. There was so much change. It was the year that single women chose themselves. It was the year that not having a boyfriend was ‘cunt’. It was the year that dating apps lost their grip, break-ups became beginnings, and women began stepping fully into the power we’ve been inching toward for decades.

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As someone who grew up in the early 2000s, the shift has felt especially refreshing. We’ve moved from the He’s Just Not That Into You era, where emotionally unavailable men were romanticised, to the Having a Boyfriend is Embarrassing era. We found ourselves in a cultural moment that centres honesty, self-respect and female desire over getting a romantic partner at all costs. 

The big shifts of the last 12 months have set us up perfectly for 2026. I suspect we’ll be a little less cynical this year, a little more open. Old-school romance might return (but in a non-cringe way). We’ll do less chasing and more choosing. I think we’ll find our way back to love again, not because we need it but because we want it. And this time, on our terms. Welcome to our 2026 ins and outs for all things sex, dating and relationships.

Ins

Call instead of text

Calling replaces texting in 2026. Texting becomes seen as a bland waste of extra admin and unnecessary screen time, as it rarely carries the emotional weight of actually hearing someone’s voice.

Asking for what you want 

Nonchalance loses its appeal entirely. Wasting time isn’t cool, but having standards is. Wanting clarity and asking for it becomes even sexier.

Meet cutes

Dropping a book in a bookstore, spilling a takeaway coffee on the street, locking eyes with someone who makes your heart flutter – meeting people romantically IRL is back. Clumsiness is required. So is leaving the house.

Friends as soulmates

Charlotte York’s “What if we’re each other’s soulmates?” feels more pertinent than ever, as romantic love loosens its grip on being the thing that defines us.

The slow burn

The slow burn earns back trust. Relationships aren’t labelled immediately, lives merged within weeks stops being romanticised, and obsession is no longer mistaken for depth. Repeat after me: good things take time.

Self-pleasure 

Masturbation booms into a mainstream essential. Elevated lube, favourite sex toys, and a regular solo sex life sit comfortably in bedrooms regardless of relationship status. Having a sex life with ourselves is normalised.

Love letters 

Romantic letter writing is officially revived from the 1800s, left to find under the pillow, in the mail, at the doorstep. They become the communication method for feelings that feel too vulnerable to say out loud.

Yearning

Yearning is officially reclaimed. Wanting someone openly is no longer something to downplay or deny. It’s rare, meaningful and delicious, and treated as such.

Female orgasms

Understanding of the female body continues to deepen. With better education, better products, and fewer excuses, female pleasure is centred, resulting in more female orgasms than seen ever before!

Artful male nudes

After years of women leading the way, men begin to offer something back, finding the good light and angles… 2026 is their time to step it up.

Erotic journaling

Erotic journaling replaces regular journaling. Fantasies, desires and imagined futures are written privately as exploration, manifestation, and rehearsal before being spoken into existence.

Manners

Manners make a hot comeback. Doors are opened, flowers are brought, and follow-up texts are sent. Politeness becomes a certified green flag.

Consistency

Hot-and-cold behaviour falls out of favour. Consistency becomes the baseline (if you want to get laid).

Threesomes

Threesomes are approached with more ease and curiosity. They’re no longer something that happens sporadically but organically and often, with friends, lovers, or people met on nights out — and are embraced as playful, expansive sexual experiences. Simple. Classic. Fun.

Spontaneity

This year, let spontaneity replace over-planning. Drinks turn into nights out, date plans stay loose, and space is left for magic to unfold without being micromanaged.

Just kissing

Kissing stands on its own once more. Messy, hours-long make-out sessions without pressure or expectation is remembered as one of life’s true pleasures.

Fingering

The art form of fingering is re-acquired among those who fuck.

Outs

Bad boys

Bad boys lose their cultural and sexual appeal. Emotional volatility stops reading as depth and starts reading as work. Yawn.

Therapy speak

Lovers who double as therapists are the enemy and conversations that sound like viral reels become exhaustingly predictable.

Ghosting

Ghosting is socially embarrassing in 2026. Silence stops being hot and mysterious and starts being rude.

Dating apps

Dating apps lose their grip as the default. They become a feeding ground for love addicts at best, not the centre of monogamous romantic hope.

The Spark

The Spark loses its mythology. Instant intensity is no longer trusted as a marker of long-term compatibility.

The One 

The One is no longer the goal. Love stops being about finding a single person and becomes a devotion to life, self, and – at times – many lovers.

Ethical non-monogamy

ENM becomes an acronym for ‘cop out’. It feels more avoidant than expansive, especially when used as a fancy label for discontentment.

Dating like a sport

The competitive approach to dating loses appeal. One considered date replaces endless first-date marathons.

Trauma bonding

Trauma bonding stops moonlighting as a turn on. Shared wounds are no longer mistaken for compatibility.

Staying in

Movie nights at home are replaced with spontaneous nights out. Walks, movies, new date ideas, new restaurants to try. Life resumes in the outside world.

Being a prude

Experimenting with an open mind is in. Sexual conservatism is out.

Splitting the bill

Splitting the bill on the first date becomes a well-known faux-par. Men assume their rightful position as the one that pays. They understand their role: with both the pay and orgasm gap in their favour. It’s a moment to give back.

Fake orgasms

Performance has no place in a world where people can have conversations.

Penetrative sex

Penetrative sex becomes a side character, not the protagonist. Pleasure blossoms into its full potential: broader, slower, more playful.

Keep up with Laura here.