14 Fashion Journal readers share their workplace romance stories

“Go for it – but be prepared to walk away from the job at some point.”

But how do you navigate nosy coworkers and professional roadblocks? And more importantly, how do you transition an in-office romance to an IRL relationship? To find out, we asked 14 Fashion Journal readers to share the stories behind their workplace romances. Here’s what they had to say.

Ashura*, 23, she/her

He was a chef at a cafe and I was a barista. It honestly was a super sexy secret, people knew we were flirty but no one had any idea until I left. We… have been together for five years, have a dog together and own an apartment! We have plans to get engaged in 2023. It worked for me, but it’s super risky.

Talia*, 29, she/her

I met my partner at work in early 2021. We were working in manufacturing, which meant we weren’t subject to COVID work-from-home rules. When lockdown hit, work was a welcome social break for everyone – it was a pretty close-knit workplace, so cheeky knockoffs were a feature. After a little while, it was clear there was a vibe. He had made a few comments to my friend who was also our boss, and I had done the same.

We were both kind of big babies about the whole thing, so it took a while for either of us to act on it. One lonely lockdown weekend, we had been texting. After relaying each exchange blow-by-blow to friends… I asked for his address, picked up a few Ruskis and hopped in an Uber.

We told one or two people at work after a few weeks, and slowly everyone just kind of found out/realised that we were together when we kept rocking up or going home together. Lockdown kind of intensified the seriousness I think… we’re still together now, and live together.

I no longer work there, but my partner does. I think it helps that we have separate lives and identities while living together, but meeting someone at work kind of gives you an insight into each other’s values, interpersonal relationships and identities… I’m a fan!

Frankie*, 35, she/they

He was a senior, long-standing employee (and also older than me). It was almost an instant attraction when we met, which was about a month into my starting. I loved the benefits of commuting together. I also benefited from being able to suck all of his knowledge about our products, etc. I ended up learning so much quicker than other new starters because of this access to knowledge. However, we did argue a lot because he sat on the business side and I sat on the customer-facing [side], so often I’d challenge why things were the way they were…

We moved state and no longer work together. When working together we were part of an acquisition. The company vibe was miserable so we both looked for other jobs. I followed him from Sydney to Brisbane for his job. I’ve been incredibly miserable and somewhat resentful, especially since he still works in the industry and I don’t.

Liliana*, 23, she/her

My partner and I worked together for six years in retail. I started when I was 16 and he was 20. The first five years we didn’t properly talk, but in the final year began flirting more at work (and people noticed). It was only once I left the job that I asked him for a drink, and the rest is history. It’s been almost three years together now! We talk every day, live separately and see each other most weekends.

Indy*, 31, she/her

We’d worked together for about two months before anything happened. I thought he was really attractive and we flirted a little bit here and there, but I didn’t think too deeply about it. One night when we were closing the bar, I (not so subtly) said to him I was nervous about staying at a house I was house-sitting alone… he offered to stay over with me, and that was that. We started officially dating maybe a month or two later.

I think relationships developing in a hospitality environment are a pretty regular occurrence. I think the age difference surprised people for a minute though. We’ve been together for over three years now. It was challenging for a little while as I switched to a day job and he continued to work nights, but only because we were so used to being in each other’s pockets… we are much less codependent now.

I’d say if you are interested in a colleague and they reciprocate those feelings (with the exclusion of a boss and their subordinate), then go for it – but be prepared to walk away from the job at some point. I don’t think working with a partner long-term or working with an ex-partner is that great of an idea. People need their own space.

Émilie*, 33, she/her

We met while working casually at McDonald’s… I was on the drive-thru window and he was cooking in the kitchen and would come to visit me in the window to flirt. We’ve been together for more than a decade and married five years ago. We’ve spent more than a decade together, we’ve both formed successful careers in technology, travelled the world, bought a couple of homes, gotten married and most recently gotten pregnant.

Gwen*, 31, she/her

In 2018, I was working at a hostel in Melbourne… I met my partner this way, he was a traveller on a working holiday visa. He was very persistent in asking me out, to which I kept saying no! Eventually, I thought ‘Why not?’. We went on the date and the rest is history! Of course, relationships with guests were a no-no, so we tried to keep it quite secret.

Once he left the hostel (it was a long-stay hostel), we were a lot more open about it… [we’re] still together! We had a nightmare two years over the pandemic where he was stuck in England and I was stuck in Australia. We didn’t see each other in person for 21 months!

… Today, we live together in Sydney and will celebrate our fifth anniversary in May. We met in a fairly unconventional way, which we both love. It makes a great story. It was pretty unexpected that we both fell this hard for each other and we were and remain very compatible, in tune with one another and in love! I think if you manage to find that rare connection with someone, go for it!

Yuka*, 26, she/her

I was an intern, and he was an operations manager. Can I make it any more obvious? As an impressionable, freshly 22-year-old in my final year of uni, I was looking to find my first real marketing job. At a cafe on a Cremorne backstreet (cliche alert), I sat swooning over his five o’clock shadow (it was 10 in the morning), white linen shirt and perfectly worn RM Williams boots. This was a man after my own private school heart.

Agonising months of longing from across the room eventually resulted in a drunken confession… at Friday drinks, which rapidly degenerated into a night of debauchery. A lot of back and forth… finally resulted in us deciding to give it a red-hot crack. After I no longer needed to go to work to see the guy and make him fall in love with me, I changed jobs! We’ve been officially together for just over a year now. After such a long build-up, it felt like a comfortable, satisfying exhale after a hot pilates class.

Olive*, 23, she/her

We would hang out at work… and over time, we learnt more about each other and navigated being more than friends. We… didn’t want our colleagues to ask questions until we were comfortable sharing. But they had an understanding of what was happening. We are still together and moved in with each other after three months of being official.

The process felt so natural, cause we were friends at work for two years already. We are so incredibly happy and we love living with each other. Considering I don’t work at that job anymore, we see each other less so we appreciate each other even more. He’s not only my partner but my best friend!

Aamina*, 29, she/her

He was my manager. Originally, we met when he was a wholesale manager for a place I worked at… we ended up working together at a shop, but honestly didn’t get together until a little bit after I left. We were always dating other people. There were definitely sparks flying at work before we realised… we’re still together, four years going strong. I feel like if you make a good team at work with no dramas, it’s likely you’ll be a great team at life.

Martine*, 40, she/her

We met when he’d transferred in from another state and didn’t know anyone. We hung out a lot on weekends, I was single and didn’t have many single friends at the time. Not long after, we transitioned to dating. We kept it private and had a circle of friends at work… so we felt like our romantic relationship was discrete. There was no policy at work except for direct manager and employee, which was not our situation.

… Once we’d moved in together, we started telling people more broadly but I think we assumed everyone knew already… we got married, and we are still married. We no longer work together. In the end, we worked together for about five years, and have worked in different organisations now for about three years.

When you come home from work, need to vent about your day and your partner knows everyone you’re talking about, it’s much harder to get a listening response. But in turn, you can unlock some much more valuable advice and perspective. We have lunch together more often now we don’t work together.

Vicki*, 41, she/her

He was my boss – but not the big boss. He also played in a ‘rock’ band, so the work crew went to his gig to show support and have a fun night out. We (the work crew) never saw the gig – we got stuck in the front bar of the same hotel having fun! After the gig, he came out to the front bar and offered us the band’s free drinks. It ended up being a big very and late night for everyone. I lived close by, so offered a couch to all. Only he accepted, the others taxied home.

No one knew. It took months for the big bosses to find out. After they did, we weren’t allowed to do extended field trips together anymore which was sad (we were often required to go away for work, five days at a time). The big boss eventually took me aside and asked me what was going on, asked me private information I’d only normally share with friends (i.e. “How serious is it?”), and told me not to compromise my job.

He never asked my partner about us… I resigned 12 months later to travel. We’ll be together for 15 years in April. We’re married with two kids, a house, a dog, etc. We got back together after I returned from travelling. He still plays music, but we don’t work together anymore. We tried to work together again, but it wasn’t a good fit for me.

Rory*, 32, she/they

I worked at the firm for eight years and never spoke to him, I’d seen him around but we worked in different departments and he seemed serious and standoffish. We ended up meeting at a Christmas party and we became friends. He wasn’t particularly flirty with me, and I liked that because all the other blokes had a real sexual harassment vibe to them… [they] would often use a Christmas party to be gross and get handsy.

He was always respectful and professional, but funny and playful. So it was easy to relax around him, I didn’t feel like he was after a ‘work wife’ or office fling. We were both devastatingly attracted to each other. He kissed me after a gala ball and that was that. We had to keep it under wraps, he was senior in the business and we weren’t sure if he was even ‘allowed’ to date me. I ended up leaving the firm anyway (it was time), and now I get to go back to my old work events in a weird and amusing new context.

When he comes home from work and tells me the latest office goss, I actually know who he’s talking about… so that’s fun. We’ve been together for two years and I’ve moved in with him at his house out in the suburbs. We’ve just started composting, we do crossword puzzles and we’re planning a trip to Helsinki in June. I pester him to make more ethical and inclusive decisions for the future of the firm, and he just wants me to be happy.

I am so grateful for my time at the firm. I had a lot of opportunities to build my career into what it is today, and I ended up meeting a serious-but-not-serious businessman who would treat me with kindness and support in a way I didn’t know possible. I’d always dated artists until now. Moody, long-haired, whimsical-but-emotionally-challenging types. I did not expect to find love in a suit and tie. But I’m glad I did.

August*, 31, she/her

We worked together for about a year and were friends. We would get beers after work, sometimes in a group, and then started to confide in each other for tougher work/people-management issues. We started getting drinks solo after work. He had a girlfriend at the time and had said he wasn’t that happy… we shared a few stories about relationship issues we could relate to. I was single and dating and having the best time, but I always thought about him in the back of my mind.

Eventually, at a group work drinks, I worked up the courage to tell him I had a crush on him. To my absolute shock, he reciprocated the same feelings. I felt fairly awful for his girlfriend but also I knew it was something I couldn’t wait on anymore… I took some annual leave for a few weeks and went away and when I came back, he had left his girlfriend. We then started dating, and now it’s been a year and a half.

We live together and just got a puppy… I’m really glad I took the risk because it feels like we are some form of soulmates now. One and a half years of the best relationship I’ve ever been in. I [sometimes] wonder if it’s because we were friends at work too, but we are really close and in love. We have a respectful and fun relationship and thinking about having children soon… it sounds kinda crazy, but it feels absolutely right to be together.

For more on navigating relationships in the workplace, head here.